PTSD And Veterans

Dear Readers,

This blog came out of one of my 2011 journals when I happened upon a very angry senior veteran…


PTSD AND VETERANS,  Journal Entry, 8-15-2011


Once or twice a week I do my volunteer job at our local hospital and I have only one thing on my mind, “Who can I witness to about the Lord today?”  Each morning, as I start my job, I quickly pray and ask for guidance.

Today was nothing special, just the usual, “Hi my name is Claire!  Would you like a book or some magazines to read…?”  Then a comment from someone, or a certain look, will start a conversation.  Sometimes, an opportunity will show it’s face for me to talk about God.  Every volunteer day I wait for that opportunity!  I look and listen for that special chance.  In and out of every patient room I pray for healing, salvation, and peace to come over the sick.  But today was routine.

Finally I finished my work and headed for my dinner in the cafeteria.  I sat down at a table to wait until the workers started to serve lunch at eleven.  Only one other volunteer was waiting ahead of me.  We talked awhile and out of nowhere I felt the urge to mention God!  Suddenly, his conversation turned to anger!  Anger against God, against war (Vietnam in particular), and against people!

“Where did this come from?” I asked my coworker.  “Is today an anniversary or something?”

“No, I’m always like this!” he responded.

“I have never seen this side of you before!  Have you ever gotten any counseling for this PTSD, to help you deal with all this anger?” I went on questioningly.

“Ya, I did!  After the war they took us aside before we left and told us we can’t do this and this and this and that anymore, when we get home!  That was all the advice we were given!  I don’t believe in God!  What kind of a God would allow those horrible things to happen?”  His frustration and anger showed all over his face.

“That’s not what I asked you!  Have you ever talked to anyone professionally about all the horror you had to go through while you were there?”

Then I was shocked at some of the horrific things he told me that went on in Vietnam!  “Why would God allow such atrocities?  Why?” he begged me for an answer.

This man is one of my favorite people here at the hospital.  Every work day I pray for God to tell me who He wants me to talk to today.  So, I decided my dear friend was the special one God sent!

“I don’t know the answer to that question, my friend.  But I do know that we can’t survive without HIM!  I write a Christian blog!”  I told him as I reached into my pocket.  ” Here’s a few of my stories that I have written over many years.  They are all true!  They are about all the things God has done in my life!”

“You like to read, I know you do!  Read these and tell me what you think, ok?  Here’s my blog address, if you would like to read more of them!”

Amazingly it was time to get our lunch, so we got up and jumped in line.  My friend went and sat down, but before I left to head home, I went back to talk to him for one last comment.

“Listen dear friend, you are one of my favorite people here!  I don’t want to get to heaven without you being there!  We’ll talk some more ok?”  I smiled and walked away.  He smiled back at me, for the first time since his angry outburst started.

Something must have triggered his post traumatic stress today!  God knew it was going to happen, and sent him in my path at lunchtime, only moments before I left the hospital.  Isn’t that amazing that we should cross paths at the exact same time?  I actually believed it was going to end up to be just another simple day at work!

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo

P.S.  Luke 19:10,  “For the Son of Man has come to seek and to save that which was lost.”  (NKJV)

Luke 19:10,  “For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost.”  (NIV)


To Victor Goes The Victory

Dear Readers,

After losing four loved ones in as many months, the Lord reminded me of a funeral from years ago…


TO VICTOR GOES THE VICTORY,    Journal Entry, 1990’s

While working as an inspector at the RTA, I was out and about doing my job.  This one particular day, I remembered that one of our bus drivers, a guy named Victor, had recently lost his father, a well loved Pastor in the area.

On Main Street in Worcester, Ma., as I was driving by his church, the Lord pulled me in for a visit.  I had no intention of stopping as I was on duty, but my two-way radio was quiet and I thought,  “Why not!  It will be respectful and only for a few minutes!”

I have always avoided wakes and funerals ever since my father passed away when I was only fourteen.  They are difficult for me and bring back a flood of memories from my childhood.

As I exited the inspector car in the parking area, I could hear beautiful music filtering outside to the city streets!  What I saw next was absolutely magnetic!  Opening the sanctuary door I entered to a jam packed interior of believers who were standing, clapping, singing, and rejoicing, like no other funeral service I had ever attended.  The sounds pulled me in to rejoice with all of them!

As I stood in the very back of the building, I became overwhelmed with the Holy Spirit like never before!  It was incredible!  I never wanted to leave!  I just wanted to stay there forever in that peaceful place, never to return to the city streets again!

I was happy, joyous, and content.  The music filled my soul, my mind, and my heart, and yet I didn’t even know this well respected man.  My friend and coworker Victor finally spotted me hiding in the nave of the church and came to thank me for stopping by.

“What is this, Vic?  I have never experienced a funeral like this!  It’s wonderful and energetic and fulfilling!  I don’t want to leave!”

“Claire,” he said gently, “This is how we celebrate when a loved one goes to be with the Lord!  It is not a sad time!  It is a joyous time!  We don’t cry, we sing and dance and praise God!  My father would do the same if he were here!”

I went on, “I can’t seem to pull myself away!  I don’t want to leave!  I feel so fulfilled spiritually!  I just don’t want to leave, I want to stay forever!”

Victor gently smiled at me, as my radio woke me up to reality.  I hugged him good bye and sadly said, “I have to go back to work! ”  Then slowly, ever so slowly, I left heaven and returned to earth!

The entire rest of my shift all I wanted to do was run back to that precious service of rejoicing!  I will never forget that time in my life when, for a unique few minutes, I stepped out of the hell of the city streets and into a heavenly church funeral!

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo


Phil. 1:21,  “For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain.”  (NKJV)






My Testimony

Dear Readers,

I believe with all my heart that God chooses my stories.  Today it is my testimony from my journal.  This is a reblog from way back when I started blogging in 2010…

MY TESTIMONY,   (Archives Blog From Nov. 13, 2010)

In my early 30’s I began to wonder if there was more to God than I knew about.  And so my search started!  My best friend was also searching.  Both of us were unsettled in our worlds and wondering what was missing in our lives.

One day, over a cup of tea at her home, we were asking each other many questions about religion and God.  While chatting, there was a knock on her front door and it was the new young pastor from the church in our little town of East Brookfield, Massachusetts.

Pastor John was invited in and we proceeded to bombard that poor man with questions!  He politely answered all of them, and then invited us to a women’s bible study on Thursday mornings.

After attending that class for a couple of months and studying the bible, as I sat at the weekly study, one very bold lady looked me squarely in the face and said, “Have you invited Jesus into your heart yet?”  I hesitated and shook my head no!

“Well, what are you waiting for?” she blurted out.

I didn’t know it then, but several ladies were offended at her bluntness towards me.  Actually, what she said was exactly what I needed to hear!  All the way home I thought about her comment and questioned myself, “What am I waiting for?”  That very night, while I was washing my supper dishes and staring out the window, I invited Jesus Christ into my heart, and my life has never been the same since.

A few days later the pastor stopped by to visit me and apologize for the bluntness of my study partner.

“No Pastor John, you are wrong!” I reassured him.  “She said exactly what I needed to hear!  I got saved that night pastor, I invited Jesus into my heart!”

Obviously he was elated!  Shortly after that evening I started writing these journal stories about how Jesus has changed my life, and now as I turn 74 years old this month, I am still writing my life’s stories.

I’m not sure why the Lord wanted me to reblog my testimony today, but after several years of blogging, I am still trying to be obedient to what I feel Him impressing on my mind!  This is His blog site, not mine!  I know He blesses obedience.

I have only one question before I close today!  “Dearest readers, what are you waiting for?  Invite Jesus into your heart today!  You will never regret it!”

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo

PS  My friend got saved as well!

John 3:16,  “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”    (NIV)


Don’t Miss An Opportunity

Dear Readers,

This blog came from my 2011 journals and is about how the Lord controls our ministries and often warns us ahead of time what to do and what to say…


DON’T MISS AN OPPORTUNITY,  Journal Entry, 6-13-2011

Today is volunteer day at the hospital for me.  My job is to go from patient room to room passing out books and magazines.  Maybe even pass out some prayer and a little chat time, if the Lord shows me.  Before work, sometimes I take a two mile jaunt around the open farm field in front of my house.  It’s my private prayer time with the Lord.

This particular walk I specifically heard the Lord tell me,  “Bring another story to share because you are going to get an opportunity today to speak of Me!”  So, when I headed off to work, I did as I was told and brought some extra stories from the archives of my blog site.

Sure enough, only a few rooms into my rounds, that is exactly what happened.  When I came to room 107, a nice quiet room at the end of the first hallway, (our hospital is shaped like a giant spider), as I entered I knew immediately this was the person the Lord prepared me for.  He was emotional, searching, and frightened!  He was questioning his own faith, but yet full of faith as well.  Also, he was fighting a battle with cancer.

At first I asked him if he would like some of my reading material.  Then I said a quick prayer and began gently talking about the Lord.  He mentioned his denomination and shared with me that he was questioning if it was the correct place of worship for him.

Tears came to his eyes as he spoke, “I’m afraid I might be missing out on part of the beauty of the Lord!”  I listened intently as he continued, “I have been in one denomination my whole life, but recently a preacher told me how to get closer to the Holy Spirit, about praying in a prayer language, and about all the spiritual gifts God has for us!”

He looked questioningly into my eyes, almost demanding me for a second opinion.  I knew it was time to share,  “One pastor told me that more people pray in tongues in other denominations than you could ever possibly imagine!”

Then, I did something I never ever thought I would do!  I shared my personal secret!  As I looked into his wondering eyes I said, “Well, I’m a conservative Baptist and I pray privately in tongues, and I have for many many years!  No one in my church knows that about me!”

He seemed almost relieved to hear that another person was feeling the way he was!  Like for the first time in his life it was okay to wonder!

We talked for at least half an hour, and then I decided to read him a previous blog entitled, “Dandelion Puff”  (Archives- February 2011).

Suddenly, his wife came in the door and he introduced her.  Sweet lady!  We all chatted a bit more and then I excused myself to get back to work.  Exiting his room I glanced back at the two of them, and immediately got a deep urging to pray!  “Let’s pray before I go, okay?” I asked.

Tears of fear filled their eyes when we held hands.  Cancer does that to people.  It fills us with fears of death and gets us thinking deeply about our lives.  I shared with them that when I went through cancer the ultra sound picture they took of my lump, was in the shape of a perfect dove, so I knew in my heart that I was going to be all right, even though it was still rough for the next year, until all the surgeries, radiation therapy,  and doctor visits were finally finished.

Then I prayed,  “Thank you Father for this profound meeting, for the patient’s new doctor that he is so pleased with, and especially for sending us Your Son, Jesus!  Please cover this patient with His blood and take care of him, in Jesus’s name, amen!”

I left that room knowing this was definitely the person that God told me I would encounter today.  How special this visit was!  How very special indeed!  I’m glad God prepared me for this moment!

Looking back at the corner room I whispered, “Thank you again Lord, for this wonderful opportunity to serve You!”

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo

Jeremiah 7:23,  “But this is what I commanded them, saying,  “Obey my voice and I will be your God, and you shall be My people.  And walk in all the ways that I have commanded you, that it may be well with you.” (NKJV)





The Best Thanksgiving Ever

Dear Readers,

I have chosen this story for my Christmas blog because it happened recently to my son on Thanksgiving day, 2017.  I can’t think of a more appropriate recognition to Jesus’s birthday…


THE BEST THANKSGIVING EVER,   Journal Entry,  November, 2017….

This is his story….

Thanksgiving meals were being provided at my wife’s hospital for all employees and their families.  After receiving a call to join her for lunch I thought, “Why not!  Anytime I can get a free holiday meal that I don’t have to prepare or clean up after, count me in!”

Driving on route  C 470 in Colorado, a two lane highway heading south, the traffic flow was a steady 75 mph.  Beside me in the right lane was an F 350 one ton pickup, pulling an enormous fifth wheel camper.

Suddenly, I noticed the traffic up ahead in that lane coming to a screeching halt!  An ear piercing squeal erupted from the escalated tires of the pickup beside me, as his brakes firmly locked!  Reacting to the potential of a collision, the truck instantly swerved into my lane!

Still traveling at 75 mph, it didn’t occur to me to step on the brakes, but only to anticipate a side impact!  In a flash, my eyes saw  his entire front grill through my rear view mirror!  He was so close I couldn’t even see the hood of his vehicle!  I’m guessing six inches at most separated us.  At that speed, I was perplexed as to why we did not collide!

As he started to put some distance between him and I, my body burst into emotional prayer,  “Thank you Lord!  Praise God!  Thank you Jesus!  Thank you for saving my life!”

I must have had a guardian angel sitting on my car that day, because while this 15 second catastrophe took place, a feeling of  “TOTAL PEACE” overwhelmed me!  It was like the hand of God was telling me, “YOU ARE SAFE!  YOU ARE SAFE!”

Love in Christ,   Art

P.S.   I totally enjoyed my Thanksgiving dinner with my wife!

Psalms 46:10,  “Be still, and know that I am God”  (NKJV)


Thank you all for reading!   Love in Christ,  and a Very Merry Christmas to all !  Claire  xoxo


We Never Know God’s Plans

Dear Readers,

As I think back over the last 20 years, I realize how God must chuckle at our life’s plans, knowing His are so very different…


WE NEVER KNOW GOD’S PLANS,   Journal Entry,  October, 2017

I remember how devastated I was when the Audiologist confirmed my suspicions that my infant granddaughter was profoundly deaf.  Little did I realize the plans God had for her.

When the call about my grandchild came in, I was working at the WRTA as a dispatcher.  I was so upset that I left work early.  Something I never did.

The doctor reassured my teary- eyed daughter that her baby would do well.  As she sat in his office at the hospital, he encouraged her,  “Do you know who sat in the very chair you and your child are sitting in now?”  Holding her tightly in her arms, my panicky daughter shook her head no.

“Miss America!  Did you hear me?  I said, MISS AMERICA sat in that very chair!  She is also deaf and she is doing great!  Your daughter will too!  Just wait and see what she will accomplish!”

What is so amazing is, that until my grandchild hit her head on the gymnasium wall playing volleyball in high school and lost all her residual hearing,  she wasn’t sure what she wanted to do for a career!  Many churches, prayer chains, friends and relatives went into prayer for her hearing to return.  When several medical professionals told us her hearing was gone forever, about four weeks passed and one incredible day, her hearing returned, and she has never had a problem since.  One day she asked me, “Nana, do you think God is trying to tell me to concentrate on my music and stop playing sports?”

“Of course He is sweetheart!  Why else would He take away what little hearing you have, and then return it to you?” I reassured her.

At that point her college choices were just around the corner and she decided to major in film production/recording arts!  I wasn’t sure she would go anywhere with this choice, but her mother insisted I let her follow her dreams.

Now, in 2017, she is a Junior in college and has followed her dream the entire time.  A text from her a few days ago said,  “NANA, I HAVE BEEN ACCEPTED TO DO MY INTERNSHIP AT FOX NEWS !   Isn’t that wonderful!”

I couldn’t believe it!  Twenty years later, her career and dreams are coming to fruition!

We never know what God has in store for our future!  To get ahead of Him is a fool’s errand!  Only He knows His exact plans for every single day of our lives!  The Bible says we are to take life one day at a time because each day has enough problems of it’s own.  And, we are to trust in the Lord with all our heart and not lean on our own understanding.  In all our ways acknowledge Him and He will make our paths straight.

Pretty sound advice I think!!


Love in Christ,  Claire  xoxo


Roman’s 8:31, “…. If God is for us, who can be against us.”   (NIV)


Time To Decide

Dear Readers,

Since we are losing several loved ones, this blog seems appropriate…


TIME TO DECIDE    Journal Entry,  September, 2017

As fall approaches, I realize that after 40+ years of being a born-again Christian, it is just now starting to sink deeply into my psyche about who God really is!   How powerful and total and awesome He is!  And, that HE CREATED EVERYTHING!  All of it!  I know it sounds silly, but I never realized how “Total” God is until recently!

As I approach the ending part of my life and watch friends, relatives, and church family dying off, I also realize I’m only a split second away from being with the God I discovered in my youth.  Also, at 73, I wonder why suddenly I’m seeing so many prayers answered!  I wonder why I feel such a deep inner peace in my being!  I wonder why suddenly money, material possessions, savings, and security, don’t seem as important any more.

Watching all the weather anomalies going on in our world lately, has just proven even more to me that in a split second, all the things we fret over could be gone anyway!  In the blink of an eye, God can take it all away, since He controls all the world’s weather too!

As I stop writing and look around at my “Things,” then glance at the TV news showing high rise buildings in Mexico falling straight to the ground in another earthquake, and thousands of homes in California reduced to a small pile of ashes, I realize to hover over all my stuff is insanity!

God is calling out to every one of us!  He is seriously telling us something!  He’s telling us to listen to HIM!  Pay attention to HIM!  Time is short!  Many Christians believe this!

Open your eyes and your hearts.  Accept the Lord Jesus now!  Don’t wait, do it now!  Invite Him into your life, ask Him to forgive your sins, and accept Him as the Savior of the world!  Please don’t wait any longer!

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo

John 3:16,  “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.”  (NIV)




Parenting A Child/Positive vs. Negative

Dear Readers,

My first child was an experience that taught me a great deal about parenting…


I have always been a hyperactive person, getting much accomplished daily.  After being married three and a half years, and struggling to get pregnant, along came my first child, a son.  This didn’t slow me down, I only worked harder and faster.  I was a systematic parent as well as a systematic housekeeper.  Everything orderly, neat, clean, and in it’s place!

As my little guy reached the age of two and a half, I started noticing he was having chronic dysentery.  After a thorough exam, my family doctor found nothing abnormal.  He referred me to a pediatric specialist, who checked him for every childhood disease possible, including Cystic Fibrosis.  I was scared, really scared!

While waiting for the test results to show up, I noticed the doctor observing me and my interaction with my child.  The specialist quickly concluded that I was a very tense mom!  After his complete examination of my son, (and I), the doctor sat us down for a conference.   With my youngster sitting on my lap, one by one, we went over all the test results, eliminating any dangerous diseases.  I finally started to relax while the doctor continued to observe us.  Then the middle aged specialist gave me his diagnosis.

“Mom, my conclusion is that you need to relax as a parent!  I have observed you for awhile and I think you need to lighten up on your parenting!”  Instantly offended, I gave him a strange look!  I considered myself to be a very caring parent.

He gently continued, “Mom, you need to let up in the perfectionist department!  You need to be more positive and less negative in your parenting!”

“What do you mean?” I asked him to explain himself.

“When you interact with your son, I want you to do more complimenting and less correcting!  Discover all the things he does well, and encourage him often!  Don’t just scold him for picking his nose, tell him how good he has been today about not picking his nose!  Understand?  Be positive all the time, not negative all the time and give him more attention when he is good, not just when he is bad!  Many parents tend to ignore their children whenever they are behaving well and only speak to them when they are getting into mischief!”   The doctor politely gave me several more examples, as well as a small book on positive vs. negative parenting.

I headed home with joy and relief in my heart over the test results, especially no Cystic Fibrosis as was feared.  I read the entire book the doctor gave me and started my positive parenting that very day!  Remarkably, with uplifting comments, the dysentery disappeared and my son’s whole personality began to change!  He responded proudly to all my daily compliments!

Very quickly I realized how little previous experience I had in child rearing.  With almost no babysitting in my youth, and both parents working in the family business, only my three older sisters taught me whatever I knew.

Life back in the 60’s wasn’t like today, where they recommend parenting classes to young pregnant couples!  For the rest of my life I have tried regularly to be a positive parent, and all three of my children turned out to be decent kids that didn’t get in trouble.  Well, maybe a little!

Today my children are, “A 40 year old daughter with her Master’s Degree in Social work, A 46 year old daughter with a Graphic Arts/Marketing Degree, and a 50 year old son who for 25 years has been and Estimator of storm damage for a large company in Denver, Colorado.  I am quite proud of all of them!

I am most proud of the fact that they have given me four grandchildren who also love the Lord.


Love in Christ,   Claire   xoxo

Proverbs 22:6,   “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.”   (NIV)




My China Doll

Dear Readers,

Today is the second time I have met this encouraging patient.  It seems God knows exactly when I need a boost!  Not surprising since He is omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient…


MY CHINA DOLL,   Journal Entry,  2017


“China Doll” I nicknamed her since she is both fragile and strong.  On my volunteer job, as I approached my final patient room with books and magazines, a huge grin greeted me!

With eyes wide and welcoming I heard, “There you are!  I thought I wouldn’t get to see you before being released from the hospital today!  I have been telling everyone about you and your stories!”  She shook my memory to an awakening of our last visit a few months ago, “I have passed your stories on to everyone I know!  Do you have more that I can read and pass on?”

Reaching into my overstuffed pockets, I managed to find a few new titles.  China went on and on complimenting my writing, and then tried to push me to get my work published!

“Oh no, it’s too late for that!” I chuckled, “I’m 73 years old!  I’ll let my kids try to publish my work after I die, kind of like Laura Ingalls daughter did for her mom!”

After talking awhile, I asked her if we could pray together, but first I thanked God for the encouragement that she gives me each time I talk with her at the hospital.

As I left her room, her doctor was coming in to release her to go home.  I glanced back at her and said, “I love you China Doll!” and within minutes I realized we barely crossed paths.  Isn’t God gracious!

At the front desk, we met again and I walked her out to her car and wished her well.  Thinking to myself as I watched her leave, “If I had not followed God’s direction and started writing my journal over 40 years ago, I never would have come this far and affected so many people with all the life experiences that the Lord has brought me through.  He enabled me to touch numerous patients, family, and friends over the years with this little ministry.  What a waste of a Christian walk I would have been if I had not followed His lead!”

If I could tell the young Christians one thing before I die, it would be, “Follow the urges of your heart for God!  Emulate His lead and watch where He will bring you over the next 40 to 50 years of your life!  You will be amazed at what He will accomplish through you!”

Love in Christ,   Claire  xoxo


Matt.6:24,  “No one can serve two masters.  Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other.  You can not serve both God and mammon.”  (money)  NIV


Hurricane Harvey



Dear Readers,

As I watch the horror of Texas and Mississippi unfold I wonder if this is yet another wake up call for America!  It is amazing how we pull together as a country when tragedy occurs.  After just experiencing the white supremacy marches in the south angering so many people, here comes another 911 to open our eyes to love instead of hate!

God alone controls every drop of rain that falls, not us!  He alone knows exactly when the storms will end and the water will recede.  Love and hate are only a split second away.

Please help the people of Texas and Mississippi and the surrounding areas in any way you can!  Do it now, while love and forgiveness are still in your heart.  And then, take time to thank God for all He has given you.  Thank you for helping.

Love in Christ,     Claire  xoxo

Eph. 4:32.  “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” NIV